Vol 4 - Coaching : Effective Questioning Techniques Series

Here is a framework for asking the right questions at the right time to create clarity and agreement around issues and to empower your direct reports.

Ask the right kind of questions

The word "empower" gets bandied about so much that one could be forgiven for overlooking what it actually means: to imbue someone with power, to instil in the individual a sense of his own strength and efficacy.

"When the boss asks for a subordinate's ideas, he sends the message that they are good — perhaps better than his. The individual gains confidence and becomes more competent," says Michael J. Marquardt, author of Leading with Questions: How Leaders Find the Right Solutions by Knowing What to Ask (John Wiley & Sons, 2005).

The most effective and empowering questions create value in one or more of the following ways:

1. They create clarity: "Can you explain more about this situation?"

2. They construct better working relations: Instead of "Did you make your sales goal?" ask, "How have sales been going?"

3. They help people think analytically and critically: "What are the consequences of going this route?"

4. They inspire people to reflect and see things in fresh, unpredictable ways: "Why did this work?"

5. They encourage breakthrough thinking: "Can that be done in any other way?"

6. They challenge assumptions: "What do you think you will lose if you start sharing responsibility for the implementation process?"

7. They create ownership of solutions: "Based on your experience, what do you suggest we do here?"

Just as important, it is up to you as the leader to model the question-asking approach so that your team, in turn, will employ it with their own reports. For example, you can track how well the team is working together by asking questions like:

· We've been working together for three hours today; what did we do best as a team?

· What enabled us to be successful in coming up with an innovative strategy?

· How can we ask better questions?

· How can we apply what we are learning to other parts of our work?

· What leadership skills helped us succeed today?

What not to ask

Marquardt points out that, contrary to the business truism "There are no bad questions," several types of questions can have a negative effect on subordinates.

Questions focused on why a person did not or cannot succeed force subordinates to take a defensive or reactive stance and strip them of their power. Such questions shut down opportunities for success and do not allow people to clarify misunderstandings or achieve goals. These questions include:

· Why are you behind schedule?

· What's the problem with this project?

· Who isn't keeping up?

· Don't you know any better than that?

Leading questions seek a specific answer, one that puts the person being asked the question in a negative light, pushes through the questioner's agenda, or exerts social pressure to force agreement. Among their many downsides, leading questions such as the following inhibit direct reports from answering candidly and stifle honest discussion:

· You wanted to do it by yourself, didn't you?

· Don't you agree that John is the problem here?

· Everyone else on the team thinks John is the problem. What about you?

While closed questions, which require specific answers, can be a good way to open and close a conversation, a whole string of them in a row, such as the following, will make subordinates feel they are being interrogated:

· Is this a good time to talk?

· What time is the meeting?

· How many people are coming?

· Who else will be there?

· When will the report be ready?

Source : http://blogs.harvardbusiness.org./

Vol 3 - Coaching : Effective Questioning Techniques Series

Effective questions are questions that are powerful and thought provoking. Effective questions are open-ended and not leading questions. They are not "why" questions, but rather "what" or "how" questions. "Why" questions are good for soliciting information, but can make people defensive so be thoughtful in your use of them. When asking effective questions, it is important to wait for the answer and not provide the answer.

When working with people to solve a problem, it is not enough to tell them what the problem is. They need to find out or understand it for themselves. You help them do this by asking them thought provoking questions. Rather than make assumptions find out what the person you are talking to knows about the problem.

For example: "What do you think the problem is?"

Behind effective questioning is also the ability to listen to the answer and suspend judgment. This means being intent on understanding what the person who is talking is really saying. What is behind their words? Let go of your opinions so that they don't block you from learning more information. Pay attention to your gut for additional information.

Powerful Questions

The following are examples of typical questions. These questions can help you improve your communication and understanding of the staff member.

1. Identification of issue:

These questions can be used in client interviews and meetings, settlement negotiations and to work with others in solving problems.

- What seems to be the trouble?

- What do you make of _________?

- How do you feel about _____________?

- What concerns you the most about _____________?

- What seems to be the problem?

- What seems to be your main obstacle?

- What is holding you back from _________________?

- What do you think about doing X this way?

2. Further information:

These questions can be used in depositions and to find out what someone has already done to resolve a work problem.

- What do you mean by __________?

- Tell me more about _______________

- What else?

- What other ways did you try so far?

- What will you have to do to get the job done?

3. Outcomes:

These questions can be used in settlement negotiations or while working with staff to plan how to do something.

- How do you want ____________ to turn out?

- What do you want?

- What is your desired outcome?

- What benefits would you like to get out of X?

- What do you propose?

- What is your plan?

- If you do this, how will it affect ________ ?

- What else do you need to consider?

4. Taking Action:

These questions can be used in working with staff.

- What will you do?

- When will you do it?

- How will I know you did it?

- What are your next steps?

source : http://www.coachingforchange.com/

Vol 2 - Coaching : Effective Questioning Techniques Series

Questions to clarify outcomes

What would you rather have?

What would you like instead?

How can you turn that problem into a goal?

What can you do to influence this?

What will it look like, sound like, feel like… when you have…?

If you could have this right now, on a plate, would you take it?

What might be the undesirable or negative consequences of achieving this goal?

What's your first step? Next step? Final step?

What resources do you need to support you in this?

What would you like to do differently?

What would you like to see?

Where do you see yourself?

Where would you like to be?

How would you like to feel …?

What is your desired outcome?

What results do you want?

What timescale are we looking at?

What's an appropriate deadline?

What are the milestones we can track along the way?

On a scale of 1 to 10, how compelled are you to do this?

Questions to aid moving from current reality to desired reality.

Has this happened to you (or to someone you know) before? What did you (or they) do to overcome it?

Has there ever been a time when…. What was it like

How would you sell your idea (if you can't, is it the right one?)

What tools do you know about that you haven't used yet? Which will you try?

What tools do you need to help you?

How can we turn this around?

In what way would you like to change the way you operate?

What could you change/do to make the situation more positive?

What current tools have you used? Which worked? Which didn't? Why?

What do you think could be done to alter the situation?

How can you change the situation?

How could you get tools within the organisation to help you?

How do you see yourself getting your desired outcome?

How will you achieve…?

What have you tried so far?

What is stopping you achieving your goal?

What needs to happen for ….?

What will enable you to achieve X, and how will you feel once you have?

What will feel, seem or look different if you achieve X?

What will your life be like when you are able to ….?

What would make the biggest difference to the way you work?

What would you like to be able to do as a result of being here?

How do you consider that we can achieve this objective?

How could you turn this around immediately, and enjoy the process?

Who already does this really well? (benchmark excellence)

How did (company xyz) crack this problem when they had it?

What research could you do that would give you more ideas?

Questions to challenge the way coachee perceives the situation.

Does the problem really lie in the task, or the way you feel about the task?

What assumptions are you making that may be questionable?

What "rules" are you using that could be challenged?

What are resources you haven't used before, that you could try?

How would you deal with it if you were a man? (or woman, or child of 7, or a wise guru, or managingdirector, the Pope, etc. etc.)

What would (insert name of coachee's hero) do in this situation?

What would you do if your bonus depended on the satisfactory resolution of this problem? (variations: or your job, or your life!)

What would the best manager in your company do?

How will your team react to the change in your skills and how will that make you feel?

What would you try now if you knew that you could not fail?

What would you do now if you were already the person you know you have the potential of becoming?

What's the positive intention of this?

source : http://www.evancarmichael.com/

Vol 1 - Coaching: Effective Questioning Techniques Series

As we know, coaching is now one of the key concepts in leadership and management. It is one of the most powerful ways to improve employee performance and it happens primarily in conversation. One of the essential skills required for effective coaching conversations is effective questioning.

Questioning is relevant to every aspect of coaching : establishing a coaching relationship, negotiating a coaching agreement, setting stretch goals, creating action plans, engaging motivation, reflecting on learning, and structuring accountability.

Therefore, in order to encourage you, the leaders of Sime Darby Motor Group (NZ) Limited, to use coaching as one of your leadership tools we are pleased to bring you the Effective Questioning Techniques Series. These will help you to coach your employees effectively in workplace.

Coaching is a skill; it is not just about following a recipe. We need to practise in order to acquire the skills. Practise makes perfect! The examples provided here are intended as a guide and as reference tips to help you become a more effective coach.

This series will focus on asking the right question, at the right time, and with the right intent.

Happy Coaching !!!

"It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question." -- Decouvertes

How do we uncover internal drive?

These questions will assist your employees in uncovering what internally motivates them based on their beliefs and values so they can access their own energy to achieve it. You are also uncovering the style of management they best respond to. Moreover you are setting up the expectations on both sides as to what to expect from one another. It certainly beats using your energy to push or stimulate interest or action based on your assumptions or beliefs based on what may work for you.

If you rely on pushing to get someone into action, they won't move unless you're there to push. It's more effective to help them articulate what they want so they can begin to self-motivate.
The real benefit of getting this is that empowering people by tapping into their internal drive does not drain your energy. Pushing for results is exhausting.

1. What do you want to be doing that you aren't currently doing?

2. What areas do you want to strengthen, improve, or develop?

3. What is most important to you in your life and career? (What does a successful career or life look like?)

4. What are the three most important things you would like to accomplish right now?

5. What is your action plan to achieve those goals?

6. What do you need that's preventing you from reaching those goals?

7. How can I best support you to achieve these goals? (Uncover how each employee wants to be managed and supported.)

8. How can I best manage you and hold you accountable for the results you are looking to achieve?

9. How can I hold you accountable in a way that will sound supportive and won't come across as negative or micromanaging?

10. How do you want me to approach you if you don't follow through with the commitments you make? How do you want me to handle it? What would be a good way to bring this up with you so that you will be open to hearing it?

Source : http://www.allbusiness.com/

Leadership Tips

1. Fix the problem, not the blame.

It is far more productive, and less expensive, to figure out what to do to fix a problem that has come up than it is to waste time trying to decide who's fault it was.

2: Tell people what you want, not how to do it.

You will find people more responsive and less defensive if you can give them guidance not instructions. You will also see more initiative, more innovation, and more of an ownership attitude from them develop over time.

3. Get out of your office.

Management By Walking Around (MBWA) does work. You make yourself more approachable. You get information first-hand. You find out what's really happening.



4. Delegate the easy stuff.

The things you do well are the things to delegate. Hold on to those that are challenging and difficult. That is how you will grow.

5. Don't get caught up in 'looking good'.

Work happily together. Don't try to act big. Don't try to get into the good graces of important people, but enjoy the company of ordinary folks. And don't think you know it all. Never pay back evil for evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honest clear through.

6. 'Quality' is just conformance to requirements.

You get the behavior you critique for, so set your standards and then require conformance to them. Quality will come from that effort, not from slogans, posters, or even threats.



7. Practice what you preach.

To lead, you have to lead by example. Don't expect your people to work unpaid overtime if you leave early every day. Don't book youself into a four star hotel on business trips and expect your employees to stay in the motel off the freeway.

8. Leaders create change.

If you lead, you will cause changes. Be prepared for them and their impact on people within, and outside, your group. If you are not making changes, you are not leading.

9. Don't Limit Yourself.

The difference between leaders and managers is that leaders do not set limits on themselves. There are enough people trying to limit what you can do. Don't be one of them.

10. Learn from the mistakes of others.

You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.



11. Set S.M.A.R.T.S Goals.

Goals you set for yourself, or others, should be Specific, Measurable, Achieveable, Realistic, Time-based and Stretch.

12. Anyone can steer the ship in calm waters.

What will set you apart in your career is how you perform during the tough times. Don't become complacent and relax just because things are going well. Plan ahead for the downturn.

13. You Can't Listen With Your Mouth Open.

Your associates, your employees, your suppliers, your customers all have something of value in what they have to say. Listen to the people around you. You will never learn what it is if you drown them out by talking all the time. Remember, the only thing that can come out of your mouth is something you already know. Shut up and learn.



14. You have to make a difference.

The group you manage has to be more effective, more productive with you there than they would be if you were not. If they are as productive without you, there is no business sense in keeping you on the payroll.

15. Train Your Staff.

The key to your business success is the productivity of your staff. The key to staff productivity is their perception of their immediate Leader. Invest in training for your staff. It will pay off.

Source : http://management.about.com

Principles from ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ – Dale Carnegie’s Golden Book

Leadership is influence.

- John C. Maxwell

Six Ways to Make People Like You

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.

2. Smile.

3. Remember that a man's Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

5. Talk in the terms of the other man's interest.

6. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.

Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1. Avoid arguments.

2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never tell someone they are wrong.

3. If you're wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.

4. Begin in a friendly way.

5. Start with questions the other person will answer yes to.

6. Let the other person do the talking.

7. Let the other person feel the idea is his/hers.

8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.

9. Sympathize with the other person.

10. Appeal to noble motives.

11. Dramatize your ideas.

12. Throw down a challenge.

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.

2. Call attention to other people's mistakes indirectly.

3. Talk about your own mistakes first.

4. Ask questions instead of directly giving orders.

5. Let the other person save face.

6. Praise every improvement.

7. Give them a fine reputation to live up to.

8. Encourage them by making their faults seem easy to correct.

9. Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.

We firmly believe that how people live, how they think,

and how they act and react to life’s situations

can be positively influenced.

Byron & Catherine Pulsifer

Seven Types of Listeners and Tips for Better Listening Skills

Exceptional listening skills and the ability to persuade others to your way of thinking make the difference between good and great teams. Pure listening builds trust, credibility, and respect. One reason is that when you fully listen instead of trying to compose your response, the result is a relevant and on-target response. What you say when you do respond is proof of how well you listen.

1) The "Preoccupieds"

These people come across as rushed and are constantly looking around or doing something else. Also known as multitaskers, these people cannot sit still and listen.

Tips

If you are a "Preoccupied" listener, make a point to set aside what you are doing when someone is speaking to you.

If you are speaking to a "Preoccupied" listener, you might ask, "Is this a good time?" or say, "I need your undivided attention for just a moment." Begin with a statement that will get their attention, be brief, and get to the bottom line quickly because their attention span is short.

2) The "Out-to-Lunchers"

These people are physically there for you, but mentally, they are not. You can tell this by the blank look on their faces. They are either daydreaming or thinking about something else entirely.
Tips

If you are an "Out-to-Luncher," act like a good listener. Be alert, maintain eye contact, lean forward, and show interest by asking questions.

If you are speaking to an "Out-to-Luncher," check in with them every now and again and ask if they understood what you were saying. As with the "Preoccupieds," begin with a statement that will catch their attention and be concise and to the point, because their attention span is also short.

3) The "Interrupters"

These people are ready to chime in at any given time. They are perched and ready for a break to complete your sentence for you. They are not listening to you. They are focused on trying to guess what you will say and what they want to say.

Tips

If you are an "Interrupter," make a point to apologize every time you catch yourself interrupting. This will make you more conscious of it.

If you are speaking to an "Interrupter," when they chime in, stop immediately and let them talk, or they will never listen to you. When they are done, you might say, "As I was saying before..." to bring their interruption to their attention.

4) The "Whatevers"

These people remain aloof and show little emotion when listening. They do not seem to care about anything you have to say.

Tips

If you are a "Whatever," concentrate on the full message, not just the verbal message. Make a point to listen with your eyes, ears, and heart. Pay attention to body language and try to understand why this person wants to talk to you about this issue.

If you are speaking to a "Whatever," dramatize your ideas and ask your listener questions to maintain their involvement.

5) The "Combatives"

These people are armed and ready for war. They enjoy disagreeing and blaming others.

Tips

If you are a "Combative," make an effort to put yourself in the speaker's shoes and understand, accept, and find merit in another's point of view.

If you are speaking to a "Combative," when he or she disagrees or points the blame, look forward instead of back. Talk about how you might agree to disagree or about what can be done differently next time.

6) The "Analysts"

These people are constantly in the role of counselor or therapist, and they are ready to provide you with unsolicited answers. They think they are great listeners and love to help. They are constantly in an analyze-what-you-are-saying-and-fix-it mode.

Tips

If you are an "Analyst," relax and understand that not everyone is looking for an answer, solution, or advice. Some people just like bouncing ideas off other people because it helps them see the answers more clearly themselves.

If you are speaking to an "Analyst," you might begin by saying, "I just need to run something by you. I'm not looking for any advice."

7) The "Engagers"

These are the consciously aware listeners. They listen with their eyes, ears, and hearts and try to put themselves in the speaker's shoes. This is listening at the highest level. Their listening skills encourage you to continue talking and give you the opportunity to discover your own solutions and let your ideas unfold.

Tips

If you are an "Engager," keep it up. People truly appreciate this about you.

If you are speaking to an "Engager," take the time to acknowledge their attentiveness. Thank them for their interest in you and your topic.

Source : http://www.dalecarnegie.com/
The link provided by : Tania Roberts, TIL.

Every person in this life has something to teach me,

and as soon as I accept that,

I open myself to truly LISTENING.

Thanks to Catherine Doucette